Clearing Up

For a very long time now, there is something I wanted to change.  The task seemed a bit insurmountable.  I need a piece of heavy machinery. The reason for doing this was that this obstacle was affecting my feng shui.  It is never a good idea to have something massage blocking your entrance to abundance.

As good fortune would have it, I found someone who could possibly do the job.  He was busy excavating land for a new home is being constructed just outside my development.  Having passed the construction site numerous times, it was never the right time to talk to the excavator.  Until today.

I've been asking for help with this project.  Waiting for the time when the forces necessary came together.  Just after returning from lunch with a friend, I drove into my community and saw the excavator hard at work.  There were lots of noises in this area, especially the generator.  I knew none of the four men working would hear me.  Or see me.  I pulled my car as far over to the right of the narrow entrance to my community as I could safely. Then I waited and waited. The crew was completely enmeshed in their work.  After a while, the excavator looked my way.  Perhaps it was my moving hands flagging him down?

He moved his small backhoe close to the stream where I was standing, on the other side from him.  Behind the barbed wire so he could hear me.

"I would like to have a boulder moved," I asked.

After some talk, he said he would come right up which he did.  Assessing the job, he returned with the backhoe and proceeded to pull the six hundred boulder boulder with the shovel to his backhoe.

It is the small things that have always made me happy.  Soon I will hire someone to smooth back the area.  For now, the area is lined with grass seed.  Spring can't be far away.

Soon.

Happy Everything

As the year comes to a close, it is a time to pause.

So much happened this past year, I am challenged to put it to words.

This says it all.

Happy Everything.

No Christmas

I was more excited than usual thinking about Christmas.  For one, it would be the first time both of my children and I and their families were together in the past year.  Since Christmas of 2014.  It was also the last time we would be together before my daughter has her first baby.  It meant a lot to me.  But as things go in this world, expectations don't often pan out.  This was the case this year.

I hadn't been in New Hampshire more than twenty-four hours when I started getting sick.  I had never been sick on Christmas before.  Ever.  Friends knew what this year meant to me and called to see how it was going.  Well, that began a bit of a landslide of conern. There is nothing like a phone call.  Intonation, listening for clues, it says it all.

"You know you are puking your heart out," she said.

Words could not be more true. Time.  It is all we have anyway.

Use it well.

Christmas

As a child, Christmas was filled with anticipation, smells coming from the kitchen days and weeks before the holiday.  My grandparents would come over along with my bachelor uncle.  It always felt so good to have my family around.

Dad would be busy fixing the lights, setting up the train, repairing the train so that it would make a few rounds on the track.

My brother and I often peaked into the wrapped presents which Mom would position on the table near the Christmas tree in our downstairs recreation room.  When we were older.

Dad took off that year and Christmas was quiet.  In truth it had been quiet years before.  I was glad things were as good as they were.  The following couple of years, my brother moved away.   Forever. He would come home once in the summer and we wouldn't hear from him for months.

In the many years to follow, I would return to Mom's.  She had remarried and moved into her husband's home some thirty minutes to the west of us.  By that time, I had married and had children of my own.  For many years, we would make the trek back to Moms.  Even when we moved seven hours away.  We always came home.

My senior relatives have passed.  My children have grown and moved away.  They have families of their own.  Christmas still holds the same magic.  The traditions matter less.  Being together as a complete family is everything.

In two days I will see them all again.  For the first time in a year, all of us will be together.  A baby is on the way and that is the best gift I could ever have.

Soon.

Calendar Closes

The calendar year is closing.  With each close, there is a time for stillness.  Letting things, people, circumstances be as they are.  It doesn't mean you have to like how things are, it means you come to terms with it.  And release them.

You also release ways you have been this year, ways which have not been kind, ways you may have over-reacted, ways of unconsciousness.

It also means you hold dear those who are in your heart.  Close friends, family, people you adore and cherish.  People who are there for you, take the time to be in your life, laugh, cry and have fun with you.  It is those tender moments of kindness and compassion we all need so desperately.

I am sitting in the studio looking outside at the mountain range, taking in the beauty of the land.  A frontier of opportunities. Trees affirming the changes of the seasons.  Just a glance out the window.  Wildflowers sprouting up at the first hint of spring.  It is a glorious time and I am honored to be a part of it.

As the calendar year closes, another one opens.  What will 2016 be like for you?  What will you call in?

American Airlines and Cat Dander

A flight home from Charlotte-Douglas Airport (CLT) to Asheville Regional Airport (AVL) was an eye opener.  Flight 5086 allowed a cat on board.

I do like cats.  At one time I had five of them.  A mother and her four kittens.  As I have gotten older, cat dander seems to bother me.  It causes watery eyes, nasal congestion strong enough for medication and a scratchy throat.

When I booked my flight with American Airline, no where did they state they allow cats on board. According to The Asthma Center,   About 5-10% of Americans are allergic to pet allergens. That lmeans between 16,000,000 and 32,000,000 people are the "most sensitive individuals" who "may suffer greatly from the slightest exposure to animal dander, and reactions to cat dander can be particularly explosive."

 
Cat Allergy Symptoms

Cat allergy symptoms range from mild to severe, depending on an individual’s sensitivity and the level of exposure to allergens. Those variables may also influence how quickly symptoms develop after exposure. Highly sensitive people can develop symptoms, including breathing problems or a rash, within minutes of touching a cat or entering a house with a cat.

Cat allergy symptoms may include:

• Sneezing or a runny or stuffy nose
• Facial pain (from nasal congestion)
• Coughing, chest tightness, shortness of breath and wheezing
• Watery, red or itchy eyes
• Skin rash or hives

http://acaai.org/allergies/types/pet-allergy

Immediately upon sensing the cat's presence, behind my window seat, I asked the flight attendent to move me.  Some fifteen minutes later, she moved me just three rows up.  There were several available seats on the plane a considerable distance away from the cat dander.

Buyer beware!  

An Open Mind

At the end of his talk someone from the audience asked the Dalai Lama, "Why didn't you fight back against the Chinese?" 

The Dalai Lama looked down, swung his feet just a bit, then looked back up at us and said with a gentle smile, "Well, war is obsolete, you know." Then, after a few moments, his face grave, he said, "Of course the mind can rationalize fighting back ... but the heart, the heart would never understand. Then you would be divided in yourself, the heart and the mind, and the war would be inside you."

History always repeats itself.  In thinking about the 'alleged' Isis, a friend put on a link on Facebook which resonates with how I feel. We do not know who is responsible.  


"There is a reason ISIL still want to appear so powerful, why they don’t want to acknowledge that the land they control has been taken from weak enemies, that they are pinned down by air strikes or that just last weekend they lost a significant part of their territory,” he said on The Project."

 Please listen:

http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/tv/waleed-aly-hits-out-at-isis-over-paris-attacks-calls-them-weak/story-fn948wjf-1227611388541

Blank Page

The greatest destroyer of peace isn't mass murders.  It is more about the response to these mass murders.  Only yesterday, Paris experienced what we are told are political murders.  We have no idea who did this or why.  We do know what the media spews.  What government spews.  We have learned too well not to trust either.

Nearly everywhere people are discussing these horrendous acts.  They guess who did this and why.  They talk on and on about it.   It occupies the media day and night.  Government types become academic, decide what they will report and the sheeple repeat it.

This is the second time this year Paris has experienced recent killings. It is everywhere on the news day and night.  No where do citizens investigate what really happened.  They don't want to know.  They want to continue taking selfies, going to their favorite brewery and go about their business.  They don't look to the governments which got them in this mess in the first place.  And while their hearts ache for these unnecessary deaths, all will be forgotten until the corporate government media reminds them again to be in fear.

Once again more and more innocent people die because of lies.  Lies. The greatest destroyer of peace is indifference.  Indifference to the situations which allow these deaths in the first place.  My heart breaks for all these families.  I have hosted many over the years.  I wonder if any of my exchange students were killed, hurt or maimed.

The worst destroyer of peace is also the inaccurate report telling us who is responsible.  There are those who will do the investigative journalism.  Some will disappear.  Some will die suspiciously.  It is rare that any of it will reach the main stream media.  They are owned by the corporations who have clandestine relationships with government.

It is well nigh time for honesty.  For truth.   But until the critical masses expect more, take an active role in citizenship, the same thing will continue.

 A blank page.

Rethinking Veteran's Day

This government has no interest in celebrating peace. They would rather spend money on public relations campaigns to enlist more soldiers. They want to show you how to be a man, how to be a woman. They will glorify the weapons used and tell you how important you are to the country. They will even deliver a flag at your funeral. Should you survive this atrocity, you won't have a job to come home to, you do have a good chance of leaving your limbs behind. Health care? Good luck.  

This government cares about extracting natural resources, dominance and making money for the corporate government and the military industrial complex. I cannot thank the veterans of the wars post 1950. My heart goes out to them because they were duped. They were put in harm's way because of lies their government told them.  

Recently, I had the occasion to go to a meeting at our county's administration complex. Security was installed, similar to what they have at airports now. I walked through once, protesting the entire time. Nearly everyone had the same comment, "everyone is doing it." Everyone is doing it? So we are mere cattle to the slaughter exposed to radiation and who knows what else. But this is the government we have allowed.  

Citizenship requires participation. Commitment. A critical mass. Until all of this changes, our people will be put in harm's way and our civil rights eroded. I don't want to celebrate Veteran's Day. I want to protect all of them like a mother protects her child. I want to celebrate peace.

Saving You

All too often there comes a point in one's life where things just cannot continue.  You can't continue, you refuse to continue walking the same path.  It isn't just the neediness of those around you, the people who slam the door in your face, the forgotten birthdays, the lack of engaging.  It is seeing the hit and run messages, the last minute connections, the intensity all around you.  You feel enormous compassion, absolute kindness and you remember yourself in the equation.  You wonder why you allowed it to continue this long.  You say.  STOP.

Within each of us is an aspect of self-leadership.  Sometimes we access it, sometimes we are running too hard and too far away from it to realize it.  A friend recently inquired "why don't people engage?"
It was hard to respond to him without hours of discourse.

"Because they can," I said.

"There is too much focus on the self and not enough of it.  How is that for an answer?"

It is all in the balance.  Sometimes we muster the courage to revisit a painful event.  That happened with a friend this past weekend.  A well known abductee.  A UFO abductee.  He has not been able to even view the film depicting his life, his story much less return to the area where this occurred.  Until this weekend.  Those events are stories for a time when it is no longer so painful to remember.  This weekend, along with a few of his friends, he visited the site of his world renown abduction.  Courage as Dan Rather, so eloquently reminded us.  Courage.

For all of us who muster the courage to create a new path, engage with another, give a hug for no specific reason other than to feel close, I say COURAGE.

Leaves continue to fall as the rains wash away what no longer serves each of us.  Will you find a way to be your own self-leader?

I hope and pray you find a way.  Because the ultimate task is really simple.  It is all about.  Saving you.

November

This has always been one of my favorite months.  From early on, birthdays at our family home were really special.  My Mom let us pick what we wanted for dinner.  I always chose roast beef, mashed potatoes, peas (love them) and a chocolate angel food cake.

Finances were limited then, but Mom always made sure we had a gift.  I never cared much about a
present - still don't; I did appreciate having my family together.  That, for me, was always the gift.

Birthdays in my home when my children were living there were even more special.  I celebrated the entire day with them - morning to night.  Even though my children are at a distance now, their birthdays mean the world to me.  I am grateful they have mates who continually honor their birth.

The month in which someone is born is significant.  November welcomes the letting go of the year's past activities and experiences.  As the chlorophyll decreases, our energy does as well.  We don't have to work so hard.  It is a time of reflection.  A time to go within.  A time of nothingness.  I like that.

No thing.  Nada.  Devoid.  As is.  November.

How To Hold Me

This is How I Want to be Held, Before your Hands Even Touch Me.

Via Xiren Wangon Oct 28, 2015

I want to be held. Believe me, I do, but I need more than a pair of heavy arms wrapped around me, tying me down when my soul is soaring.

I want to be swept off my feet, because if I desired to hold you I would want to sweep you off your feet, too. I would want to unbalance you so much so that you would fall right into my arms.

I would be there to catch you; I planned it that way.

I want to be held, because I grew up reading Jane Austen’s every word, and to be approached and enchanted like that shouldn’t be a thing so antiquated that you only read it in novels now. Modern romance as conducted through swipes, snaps and shorthand messages leaves me hungry for that “meaning” we all yearn for.

I’m starving, and emoticons just don’t feed me.

Meaningless entanglements of the limbs don’t feed me either; I need more than the vague pretense of a hold. Because nothing’s colder than an empty hold.

To hold my body, you have to hold my mind first.

Before we’ve met, hold me with your gaze. Hold me there for a few seconds, hold my breath, just breathe me in—lock eyes with me for one more moment—and just like that, compel me closer to you.

When we meet, address me in a manner that shows your force of character. Approach me with grace, and respect that I have a name. Don’t jump the gun on “baby” talk; conversely, don’t call me your “buddy,” either. Premature anything is less-than-desirable, and it’s nice to be differentiated from being “one of the guys.”

If we meet again, please find greetings other than “Yoooo.” (I’ve yet to encounter a successful man who addresses a lady like this.) And if you go for nicknames, show intellect and imagination, because wooing someone is an art.

When we hold conversations, tell me what you love. Tell me about your day, your world, your passions, your dreams—I’m all for that. Better yet, teach me what I don’t know. If you have me locked in a conversation with you, green lights, I want to know. There’s nothing more sexy than a man in focus. Nothing more attractive than seeing someone light up in their element. “A man’s worth is no greater than his ambitions.” Words of gold from Marcus Aurelius. So show me.

I will remember you for what lights you up, and how you light up and how warm that felt. So talk to me, and hold me with the tongue you speak. We can skip the part about the crazy exes, the bad friends and the nightmare parents or bosses from hell, because speaking poorly of others will reflect poorly on you. Refrain from that descent. Not now, not yet.

If you’re still holding me by now, ask me for what I like. Everyone has tastes and preferences; you don’t know if you don’t ask. Hold me with your questions, your intrigue. Figure me out, or at least attempt to, because the arrogance to assume you know what’s best will just make me want to skip the rest and go home alone.

Men who take charge are sexy, but men whose egos run the show are chauvinists in disguise. Real men never neglect to ask. Assume nothing.

And because who doesn’t have 99 problems? If I share mine, please offer tangible solutions. A single, pitiful expression of “That sucksss…” is not something I need to reacquaint with. Believe me, with first-hand experience I know better than you can imagine. Yes, that sucks, so please don’t make it worse; offer real solutions.

Be the man that I so need in moments when I most need to be held. Hold me together with your strength, your ability to figure things out, your balance, your solutions, because some days I’m a crazy hot mess, a train-wreck or a damsel in distress.

Hold me by grounding me.

If you still want to hold me—and really want to hold me more—don’t kidnap me away from what I love to do. Hold me, but don’t hi-jack me. Don’t tell me that I need a break, because I run on what I do.

Hold me with sincerity. Genuine sincerity trumps slick lines any day. I’m of the creed that’s immune to sugarcoated sweet-talk.

Lastly, if we ever get to promises, hold your promises, because a man is only as good as his words.

And if you’re still holding me, then now is when you lay your hands on me, and sink your teeth in me and let me teach you how it feels to be held like this.

~Relephant Read:

Date a Man who will Stroke your Mind.

~

Author: Xiren Wang

Editor: Toby Israel

Photo: Amy Wilbanks/Flickr // L. Whittaker/Flickr

WhistleBlowers

Lacking eloquence.  Maybe.

Maybe it doesn't have to be eloquent.  Maybe it just has to connect to something within you.  Within me.  Something that ties our humanity together.

What if you didn't know who I was.  Gender.  Age.  Appearance.  Would the words resonate more?  Less?  What if I were 90.  Would that make a difference.  It shouldn't.

A friend this morning told me about her dad.

"He wants what you want. He is a boots in the mud hunter.  Everywhere he goes he gets a hunting license.  He is a nice guy but you are too different," she says.

She knows me.  She knows herself.  She is one progressive woman.  Says what she thinks, is kind, is more than courageous.  I like that.  Courage.

Her mom is still a helicopter mom in her mid sixties.  I found that incredibly hard to relate to.  My blank face speaks volumes about that.  It is all too similar in some ways. Some go through the motions of it.  Some feel it and daughters intuit it.  Does it really matter how it is expressed?  It is felt.

Tomorrow I am going to see the film, Truth.  It is about Dan Rather spilling the goods on George W. Bush.  I remember the story that broke.  His apology.  His not needing an apology but sucuumbing to CBS pressure.  He was ultimately released by CBS.

Robert Redford will do a fine job on this.  I can't wait to see it.  We need more whistleblowers.

Feelin It

Are you feelin it?  Feeling the change in vibration and frequency?

When the inner shift happens and we awaken in greater consciousness we will find that life as we knew if starts disintegrating.

A lot of Lightworkers' panic buttons go off when they start losing family or friends or whatever because of the inner shift - the fact is that as your own vibration frequency changes and is moved into the higher bands, you will not be able to relate to them in the same manner. You have shifted, therefore you will find that even the language is not the same because of your inner being shifting and them staying in the same lower vibrational state.

It is nothing to fear, but rather to embrace. For you will find that new family and friends arrive who are on the same wavelength as you and they will often make up for what you seem to have "lost."
We are never left as orphans and when the human family cannot move into that higher gear, then the cosmic family steps in and assist in all and every way they can.

(Judith Kusel)

Fall is a time of release.  We see it in nature through the changes in coloration of leaves.  We see it as when the length of daylight decreases and chlorophyll breaks down. Green leaves become yellow, orange, gold and red.

The woman who used to cut my hair told me that fall was a time of examination for her.  She looked back on her life and evaluated where she was, who her friends are and who would begin the new year with her.  She wasn't angry about the change, but felt it was necessary for the person she was becoming.  

My heart is full of gratitude as the year closes.  I've connected with a few 'acquaintances' who are now 'friends' - people who have huge abundance; a large loving heart, healthy perspective, and lots of laughs over their own foibles and idiosyncracies.  It has been a time of listening for me.  Perhaps that is because my friends have been through some struggles and need a listening ear.

Yep, I am sure feelin' it!

No Panacea

If you approached the American public to propose a new social welfare program, there’s a good chance that most people would be enthusiastic about your idea. The people who could benefit from the program would obviously be receptive, and even the people who didn’t need it, would like the idea of helping the less fortunate members of our society.

However, these attitudes can turn on a dime once you tell the second group that they are going to pay for this program. See, we all like free stuff without strings attached, and most of us feel good about helping people, but only to a certain extent. If it’s no skin off our backs then we’re more than happy to help, but if it’s going to be a major financial burden to help someone, especially if we’ve never met this person before, it’s going to be a hard sell.

Now that our lesson on human behavior 101 is over, let’s start a new lesson on socialism 101. Socialists know that the average person doesn’t like to spend his money on people he doesn’t know, and for services that he doesn’t need. So how does a socialist convince everyone to accept the social programs that they want to impose on society? They lie of course.

They always tell the middle and lower classes that somebody with more money than themselves, is going to foot the bill. Unfortunately, everybody who lives under a socialist system will lose something, one way or another. In moderate socialist states, like the kind that Bernie Sanders has proposed, everybody pays with either higher taxes, low quality products and services, or a loss of economic freedom. Under extreme leftist regimes, the bill is paid with a mountain of corpses.

Make no mistake though, everybody will pay, so don’t believe any socialist who tells you that somebody else is going to be your sugar daddy. Least of all, don’t believe Bernie Sanders when he says that only the upper class is going to pay for his social programs, which is exactly what he claimed when he was interviewed by Bill Maher recently.

Maher, despite being sympathetic to Sanders, actually challenged him on the notion that we could pay for his programs by simply taxing the super rich. After discussing his ideas and how America would pay for them, he broke everything down into simple terms.

OK. But you want to increase social security.

“And you know how we do that? We pay for it. We say that somebody who’s making $10 million should not end up paying the same amount as someone making $118,000. Lift the cap. We can extend and expand social security.”

You also want free college.

“We do. Not free college—free tuition at public colleges and universities. You know how we pay for that? Through a tax on Wall Street speculation.”

So you’re saying we can pay for all this without raising taxes on anybody but the 1 percent?

“We may have to go down a little bit lower than that—but not much lower. And what people have to understand is right now people can’t afford to send their kids to college, and people are graduating school deeply in debt. Do I think we should join Germany and many other countries and encourage young people to get the education that they need, and make the country stronger? I sure do.”

You’ve got to love statements like “not free college-free tuition at public colleges and universities.” That’s socialist doublespeak at its finest.

What’s worse though, is that he’s clearly lying about only taxing the rich. That’s obvious enough, but not just because he’s a socialist. Contrary to his interview with Maher, he revealed on ABC’s “This Week” that everyone is going to feel the Bern. After Stephanopoulos repeatedly asked him if he would tax people below the 1%, he had this to say.

Sanders said, “I think if you are looking about guaranteeing paid family and medical leave, which every other major country has so that when a mom gives birth she doesn’t have to go back to work in two weeks. Dad or mom can stay home with the kids. That will require a small increase in the payroll tax.”

Stephanopoulos said, “That’s going to hit everybody.”

Sanders agreed saying, “That would hit everybody, yeah, it would but it would mean we were drawing the rest of the industrialized world and make sure that when a mom has a baby she can in fact stay home with that baby for three months rather than go back to work at the end of one week.

Perhaps that’s just one issue, but he seems to think that he can pay for everything else by closing tax loopholes and penalizing Wall Street. It can certainly be said that there is a serious income inequality problem in this country, but there is no amount of money in the world that is going to pay for socialism, because it always leads to insolvency and poverty. And since the rich never have enough money to support this kind of system, all of us will wind up paying.

Sorry Bernie, you can’t fool us all.

Delivered by The Daily Sheeple

---

Contributed by Joshua Krause of The Daily Sheeple.

Joshua Krause is a reporter, writer and res

Comment by blogger:  Look at the mouth.  What does THAT tell you?

http://www.thedailysheeple.com/liar-liar-bernies-on-fire_102015

Police State Right Here

I am struggling to understand HOW county employees and commissioners do not have to go through Judge Letts' metal detector experience to enter the admin/court system while the rest of us do. Seriously now.  

It is said these folks 'wear a badge .  A badge of exception, entitlement.  The rest of the populace is forced to have their purses exposed to radiation and who knows what to their person.  

Did anyone see the numbers warranting this expenditure?  Were their threats in the court room, in the administrative building?  Why is it we never heard about it?  More judicial secrecy? Or was it merely a threat by a Superior Court judge?

What this will do to this writer is keep her out of this building.  Fewer or no appearances to stand up for our civil rights at Commissioner's Meetings.  Fewer or no appearances in the various county departments.  

Moreover, I am aghast at the sheeple who filed through this experience with no comment at all.  Aghast when one Executive Director of a non-profic commented,

"I'm just glad I didn't have to take off my shoes," he said.

He sat next to me at the hearing on the changes to the steep slope ordinance.

People sheeple irregardless of political affiliation or not.  What happened to these people?  When did they give up their liberties?

Yes, there is a police state right here.  

http://www.thedailysheeple.com/10-ways-to-kick-the-police-state-in-the-face_122014

No, Thanks!

Now why would anyone put gory photos on Facebook?  Haven't we seen enough cruelty to animals, people, the disenfranchised?  Since most of our friends share the same qualities as we, who would you think you are preaching to?

I have seen more than enough of "The Donald",  heard enough bi-partisan slurs, a comment about Zionist Jews transporting illegal organs.  Give me a break!

So now we are attacking someone based on their religion?  On Fb?  Totally inappropriate and beyond a waste of space.  Less and less, I access this social media.

What I do enjoy accessing are nature photos, animals at play, in the woods, rivers, streams, incredible photography, nice comments, things that will lift the human condition.

Recently, I completed a Briggs-Myers questionnaire.  In the past I have been an ENFJ.  Now I am an INFJ.  Go figure.  Perhaps the online questionnaire is off?  I suspect the "I" part is accurate;  I do spend more time within.  It is probably due to years of eastern philosophical training, practicing mindfulness meditation and reading lots of books on human behavior.

I was married to an ISTJ when I was an ENFJ.  We were diagonal opposites.  I suspect little has changed in my actual scoring other than I am more introverted now.  I am probably an INFJ now.

Get To The Point!

In our broadcast media dominated world, blah blah blah seems to be the behavior of choice now.  Since I do not have radio, a newspaper or for heaven's sakes, television service by design, I don't hear too much of that.  On occasion, when their might be a topic of interest, I will into a radio talk show. 

I wish there were a more gentle way to say this.  Here goes.  The blah, blah, blah of these 'amateurs' puts me to sleep.  It is the continual non-sense of whatever they are blah, blah, blahing about that tunes me out.  It is almost as bad as the mainstream television networks.  Almost.

Most recently, I decided to try a talk show dealing with the paranormal, ufo's and things of that ilk.  The host talked for well nigh thirty minutes about nothing that make any sense to the non-flatliner.  Thinking they would surely speak to the subject at hand, I waited.  And waited. 

Getting up a few times to wash dishes and prepare for the next day didn't help too much.  It did complete a couple of house chores.  It did not distract me enough to allow me to continue listening to the talk show. 

Even worse the guest had no clue how to talk.  After another fifteen minutes, I realized I had not heard one single thing.  Now in the paranormal community, it tends to be among some that, "I know something you don't."  It isn't shared like an aha moment.  Or an eiphany.  It strikes of serious ego and totally turns me off.  

But this isn't the worst of it.  Please listen on. 

It is a sad commentary on the listening audience, who apparently have such dull lives that they will sit with numb bottoms to listen to that crapola.  This writer, well, just can't.  I can't understand the ego it takes to occupy air space with dead chatter.  Surely, someone must put the broadcaster out of their misery but telling them the sad news.  They are dull as dishwater!

I realize sometimes the host pays for air space.  Pays so that the unfortunate can hear them breathe.  Perhaps in some odd way, they validate themselves.  Or pay to their sad egos.

If you want an audience with a pulse, I strongly suggest to these radio stations that they stimulate the listener.  Tell the complete story from the get go.  And please.  

Get to the point!

Missing Molly

One year ago, September 4, 2014 I lost my beloved Molly.  She was fourteen and I knew we were on borrowed time. The hair around her face was getting white and gray.  She had lost muscle mass.  Her teeth were cracking despite a lifetime of regular dental cleanings and brushing at home.   It was difficult for her to jump up on the sofa or bed.  Steps were a struggle.

Nothing could have prepared me for her grand mal seizure.  The violence of it all is fresh in my mind.  Feeling helpless.  Seeing the fear within her as she lost control of all her muscles.  Even the slow recovery was painful.  She was terrified.  I was, too.

Molly and her sister, Jessy, are in the forest garden.  Their ashes are still visible.  I visit them often.  It is still too fresh to climb the steps to the garden without tears.  In some ways, I hope the tears never stop.  They are a testament to the depth at which they were loved.  Are loved.

Living things don't end.  They change from one form to another.  In this way, theyare always with me.  Whether in the car, or at night.  I can still feel Jessy's presence as she peers between the back of the car seats watching my every move as I drive.  Often I call out to her, "Mommy loves you."  Or, "we are almost home."  Those phrases always elicited tail waggings.  Perhaps it is just the tone used; I like to think they can feel the love coming from my heart.

Molly was sharp, protective, spiteful and sometimes cuddly.  The latter was rare.  I remember her always positioned sitting looking away from me, as though standing as a watchdog. She was twenty-five pounds, often a mere twenty-three.  She would have done anything to protect me.

She smelled the bear the night before I heard it.  Pacing back and forth across the oak floors, almost running.  Her olfactory senses were more keen than any dog I have known.  She could find anything given the command.  Once, after a heavy snow and then rain, she retrieved her favorite tennis ball from the top of the mountain where we lived.  It had been buried under mud.

"Find your ball, " I beckoned.

She did, almost instantly.

Yes, it has been one year since Molly's passing.  She is and will always be heart of my heart.  I was lucky to have been honored loving and caring for her.

"Mollyyyy.  You're home"

For Baby

Happiness.  Creating something new. This is the view from my small desk in the studio.  I chose this location because of its access to windows.  You can see the dogwood outside the window on the left as the leaves turn from green to crimson.  The birds outside are following the thermals as the rain gently cascades down.

This is where it begins.  With an idea.  This fabric will be used to make the baby's valance.  The former guest room was cleared out - mostly the closet and bookcase.  This was my daughter's dresser.  We painted it white a few years back.  Soon it will be filled with stuffed animals, and more books.

When the baby is born in early 2016, the window valances will be made from this fabric below.  Polka dots.  Fits nicely for either a boy or a girl.

Up Or Not

This has been a trying week.  This has been a wonderful week.  Which shall I choose to focus upon?  Two deaths in my community that were hidden by the tax payer funded county sheriff's department?  The changing of the leaves during the beginning of fall foliage?  The autumn smells that fill my senses.

Both are garnering spotlight.  So is my flight tomorrow up north.  That the travel agency screwed up my flight giving me ten minutes between flights makes it hard to smile.  I will do my best but will not destroy my health trying to make the connecting flight north.  I loathe airlines, travel agencies dealing with them, the whole experience.  I am giving thought to how to travel in the future. Or not.

The dogwoods outside my window are turning crimson.  Another tree is revealing its golden leaves, one has an orange tinge to it.  The pleasure felt looking at the fall changes warms my heart.  I will see family soon if all goes well.  Or not.  At this point, I am more than fed up with travel.  I am never tired of nature.  Lucky to live in a most beautiful area.

A friend called for lunch today.  We had a wonderful time and she came back to my house.  A fellow artist, simply put - she loved all the things I enjoy.  A clever mind, she helped me design something for my driveway.  Abundance is everywhere.  Challenges are, too.

Up, up and away.  Where ever it takes me.  Or not.

Someone Watches

Someone watches just a little too closely.

The morning began as any other Monday.  Easy up, shower, out in less than ten minutes.  Save the bed making.  That takes a bit since the comforter always needs adjustment.  And, it is heavy.  Because it is white on a red oak bed frame in a linen colored room, it has to be even side-to-side.  Well, it would be even either way.  Really.  Neat and tidy.  That is how I like it.

A short trip to town for a vanilla latte - that's half a pump - no more.  Sweet just doesn't do it.  The staff at my local cafe has my order down pat.  Often, they have my morning beverage ready.  With mug in hand, it is off to yoga another ten minutes away.  Monday yoga is the best!  A friendly group, people I have known for years, so it is always fun.  We have a yoga mascot.  The yogi's little dog, a Boston Terrier I think, who has Cushings Syndrome.

Back to town for lunch.  They had it ready today.  It was probably my long phone conversation sitting in the car with a friend in New England.  They always keep up with me and I am so appreciative.  A healthy nutty fruity salad, the standard lunch fare I seem to get on most days.  Then it is off to my home.

Today, I filled another fifty holes from the raccoon.  Fifty the night before. I caught the little bandit on the video - about ten segments from late last night to each morn.  It even got under the closed cage to eat the apples I left for the groundhog.  Hoping to capture it, too, sometime today lest it be the digger.  The video tells me it is not.  At least not in this area.  If all goes well, there will be a raccoon living elsewhere soon.  The lawn will be treated with Milky Spore and hopefully it will be a quiet autumn here in the Smokies.

Afternoon brought me out on the porch.  The corinthian bells are singing.  Hummingbirds are watching.  Flying.  Albeit way too closely.  Sometimes two pairs will start out from the same direction, each choosing a different side from which to encircle me.  Apparently they don't understand the addage, 'do not bite the hand that feeds you.'  Figuratively, of course.

It has been a week of retreat.  Staying quiet, working around the house, seeing friends and then back on the mountain.  It doesn't get any better than this in the autumn months.

Reaching for afternoon chai, the someones increase.  Watching closely.  I hold the chai as they are curious about it.  No spillage on my new laptop.  Nope.  The chai is moved further from the table.

A female hummingbird sips at the feeder.  She is soon joined by her mate whose ruby throat is brillant in the autumn sun.  Someone watches closely and this time, it is me.

September 11th!

September 11th.  A day of silence.  Remembering.  So many lost lives.  Lies.

In 1992, I had a premonition that something would happen at the World Trade Cnter in New York City.  My former spouse worked in either building one or two, I can't remember which.  I told him about my premonition.  He took a job in another corporation and was not there during the first explosion in the garage.While our marriage completed seven years later, I was glad he was safe.

The morning of September 11, 2001, something told me to turn on the television.  I don't watch much television (I do not have tv service now) but I paid attention to my intuition.  After immediately seeing the first plane hit, I knew something was amiss.  I told a friend of mine who was at my home that there were more planes.  He asked how many.

"Several, maybe four.  They are coming from different places."

I didn't know what to do with the information I had.  It has been this way lifelong.  I get knowings about things, all kinds of things.  They always pan out.

After my UFO encounter in 2010, the knowings ramped up.  This coupled with being an intuit, empathic, and clairsentient person, it often gets overwhelming.  I feel the pain of close friends, long before they can verbalize it.  I know it is not my job to fix others, but I can hold a loving, open heart for them.

Things are changing fast.  Intuitions are ramping up.  People are coming together in enormous numbers with the same conscience.  There is no centralized leader.  There are enormous, loving hearts.

In memory.

Extra-terrestrial Stealing

Research has demonstrated, extraterrestrials come for healthy people.  They come for people who are well balanced, people who can handle the experience.  Having said that, that is part of the reason I was chosen.

I was chosen because of my close relationships with so many people.  Lifelong, people of all walks of life have trusted me.  Not being judgmental, they know they can tell me their stories.  When I was away recently, several people came up to me telling me they were so glad I was home.  They have concerns, questions, experiences that they just had to share with someone.  I was that someone.

What I took away from my experience was the importance, the urgency for me to stretch enough to reach them.  Was this to be done in forms of communication?  Yes, definitely.  Some by telepathy, some through my heart.

I do feel they came to earth was to understand our human emotions.  We know from Star Trek, developed by Gene Roddenberry, who was said to have ET encounters, Spock was mostly devoid of feeling.  This theme is a major focus of their mission.

This video, just under two hours is worthwhile. It is dated but provides some foundation for studying extraterrestrials.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vB6uPBCVNPc

Western culture has a belief system that says taking people without their consent is illegal.  Doing laboratory procedures without consent is similarly illegal.  Removing memories, providing screen memories is also illegal, though the latter has no law on the books as yet.  In my opinion, it should be illegal.  It is just common sense.

Another thing.  There is a fair amount of elitism among experiencers, researchers and the like.  It is well nigh time they get over themselves.  They do not own the information or the experience.  They are merely the messengers.  One group calls themselves the 'experienced experiencers.'  Several new acquaintances made the comment, 'who left them boss?' After some thought, I tend to agree with them.  This reminds me of sororities and I never wanted to join one.

We are chosen for a reason.  It is time to get over yourself and be a good messenger.

Daydreaming My Way

Elementary school was downright boring. It was boring having to sit in a chair for a long time and I wasn't used to that.  In the early grade, I was always squirming, wiggling and moving about in my small classroom chair.  One wall in our classroom had ceiling to almost floor windows. The windows stopped about three feet from the floor.  There were radiators there and a ledge upon which to sit.  I loved sitting there.

My daydreaming began in second grade.  Often my teacher would ask me not to daydream.  How could I stop?  There were so many adventures yet to enjoy.   I did enjoy when the teacher told us to put our heads on the desk for a rest. That was my permission to take another mental adventure and I sure did.  Often it would be on a balloon floating over the playground, playing in the woods near our home, or helping a sick friend, or cuddling a puppy.  Everything about being connected to living things,  or nature fascinated me.

  

Most of the time, I looked out the window.  I imagined myself a Walter Mitty kind of person.  If you haven't read the Secret Life of Walter Mitty, you must. We read this in fourth grade and the story would be a major theme in my life. Everything about him resonated with me.  I wanted a life like his; one of adventure, exploration, trying lots of things.  Walter Mitty was an adventurer, a hero, a dreamer like me.

My fourth grade teacher was my favorite one.  She was kind, interested in her students and a friend of my Mother. She let us daydream and be who we are. She took us to a higher level.  It was one of my best academic years and it was largely because of Mrs. Katzen.  I think of her always.

Who we are begins early.  For my it was and would always be dreaming my way through life.

On Being A Nana

There is nothing like holding your grandbaby in your arms for the very first time.  When my son and his wife had their son, my son put him in my arms.  Immediately, I burst into tears.  Beyond moving.  Everyone in the room said in unison, "awww."

It was a priceless moment.  It was also priceless when I met my adopted grandbaby for the first time.  I just wanted to hold her and never let her go.  It hasn't changed a bit.  She will be two next month.  Her brother will be six the same week.

My daughter will be having her first baby in early 2016.  I will be there and more than ready!  I think about what it will be like holding her baby for the very first time.  Yes, I will have tissues on hand.  I will also be helping out for a while and will be there before she gives birth.  This Nana doesn't want to miss a single thing.

Being a grandmother is an interesting experience.  I remember my mother telling me that she worried more about the grandchildren, than she did with her own children.  I can surely second that.  It isn't just your own child, it is theirs as well.  If they are hurt, you are hurt for your own child.

It won't be long before I will have three grandchildren.  I know I am so lucky to be a part of their lives, to be able to visit often, to care for them. A third generation in our family.

And when I see my new grandbby,  I will have tissues on hand.  I guarantee I will be using them!

The Other Side

Where do I begin to tell a story of my visit to the other side?

This past weekend I had the privilege of attending the Experiencer's Speak 2015 Conference. This was held in Portland, Maine, just fifteen minutes from the beautiful Casco Bay.  At once, I was greeted by the cool, salt air and raised vibrational energy of the Portland, Maine area.

Almost immediately, when I entered the hotel the day before the conference was due to begin, one warm and friendly smile and wide, 'hello' after anoather welcomed me. One by one, one person after another as the attendees filtered in from California and from the United Kingdom.  Their smiles were radiant; the vibrational frequency palpable.

One by one, the speakers told of feeling a presence, seeing a ship or alien once, twice or throughout their lives.  Their credentials of each speaker were impeccable.  Scientists, biologists, wilderness guides, writers, contractors, accountants, professors, young people, older folks.  Some saw orbs, some had photos of space ships, some looked worn and distressed because of their abductions. Some like me, had animal totems come to them over the course of years.  Some were screen savers, or what we affectionately refer to when alien and/orspace ship turn into knowable, less traumatic beings.  Owls were one form of messenger.

One academic spoke about the importance of understanding neuroscience.  That the right and left brain have separated functions.  We know the left brain has long held a more esteemed presence since it is the analytical/storyteller portion.  It tries to make sense of what the right brain, the oneness, non-judgmental and synchronious, connected portion of our brains tell us.  We remote view in the right hemisphere where the NOW lives.  We understand the great importance of the right brain and work hard to explain its value.

We also know we live in a patterned universe. Nothing is random.  We've seen worms, segmented worms become complete bodies, trees and vegetation grow itself again, sometimes in the same space, sometimes in another.  It is anything but meaningless.  My right sided hemisphere remembers.

I was chosen.  Chosen to see a spaceship.  Chosen to tell a story.  A mere messenger charged with the task of helping humans understand that their destruction active or passive of our environment is destroying the universe.  Earth, the densest planet in our solar system is rich in metals.  Unidentified foreign objects or UFOs are here to observe. They don't want anything more.  They have what they need.  The worry about our child-like emotions, our ability to soil the land we occupy, our incessant need and choice to acquire more.

How do I tell you what I downloaded this weekend?  It is tantamount to being on a retreat.  You are instantly loved and understood.  There is no judgment.  There was a huge vibrational change in my frequency.   The first revelation was when my son-in-law was entered into a raffle for a $2500 paddleboard.  I knew he would win and he did.

What A Difference

What a difference we can make in the lives of others.

A simple phone call, note, or surprise anything.  It is the little thoughtful things that make the heart smile.  Sing.

This morning I saw a really moving video on spiritual conspiracy by Ricardo Ferrari.  There was no link for the video so I cannot insert it here for you.  A four and a half minute film spoke about the silence of caring.  This underground connection so many of us are feeling.  It doesn't appear in the media - tv, radio, newspapers.  It is a powerful movement.  There is no centralized leader.

When people meditate together, work together, feel a connection with one another, the cells tell the body everything is okay.  Cells open to receive nutrients.  DNA ungnarles.  Peace is assured.  The body is homeostatic.  It is a wonderful feeling!

I wonder if the trees, animals and plant life feel this connection.  This joy.  I suspect they do.  More and more we are seeing videos of animals making a deep human connection.  Even territorial swans.  the hummingbirds flying over me as getting less timid.  I will be ecstatic should they sit on my arm or shoulder.  We are all part of a living universe, passive or active.

Now hummingbirds encircle me.  Any time now!

Anticipation

Anticipation.  The song by the same name sung by Carly Simon plays in my head.  I like anticipating things.  Looking forward to them.  Surprises.

I could use a surprise right about now.  Feeling out of sorts and I know why.  Thinking things too deeply, this way, that way.  What the heck does it matter anyway.  The universe corrects when necessary.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average goes up and down and up again and way down today. A barometer of human emotions.  Lack of leadership.  Too much greed, destruction and not enough caring.  It goes that way.  Until it doesn't.  It doesn't say much for emotional human growth.

Once again, at my perch on the front porch a pair of hummingbirds fly close to my head.  They minmic the world.  Territorial.  The weather is hot, with humidity.  The sky is a soft blue with clouds sprinkled about.  Another rush of cool air fills the space.  I am grateful.

My neighbor is now getting the windows washed on their home.  It was quiet for a while.  It is a day long event and I am ready for it to be over.  This is my office!

I wonder if the birds are annoyed.  We all anticipate things being different at a certain time.  I remove the large spider web that covers a section of my porch near the steps again.  It has become a morning task.  The web is getting thicker and we all know the temperatures are changing.  Living things want things to be as they want.  I watch as the ant coexists with the worm.  And the worm with the spider.

It is cooler inside.  Quieter.  I anticipate a nice afternoon shower.  Cooling off. Now.

Trump This!

Are you like me and so tired of seeing The Donald's name on the computer, or television or radio?  Enough of him.  Pfftt!

I will take this anyday:

From 29 August Venus conjunct Mars brings relief from the heavy energy we’ve experienced throughout August as Jupiter, Venus and the Sun all squared Saturn. With Saturn ruling over authority, contraction, limits and rigidity, it’s likely that for many this last month has felt a bit like walking through wet concrete.

Jupiter squared Saturn on 3 August just as the wise teacher stationed direct at 28 degrees Scorpio. With Jupiter in Leo this was a bit like someone putting the brakes on your ability to express yourself. Personally it felt like I was operating from inside some kind of bubble; I could see out but trying to make an impression on the world was not easy. I also felt a lot of negativity and loss of confidence in my dreams. Keeping the faith seemed nigh impossible!

Retrograde Venus conjunct Jupiter in Leo on 5 August, joining the square to Saturn and putting the squeeze on relationships. For me, connecting with others became a strain, especially when there was a sense that one person in a relationship was not taking full responsibility. Socially many people probably felt somewhat inhibited with a tendency to avoid social interaction. Kudos to those who resisted the urge to crawl into a hole and feel lonesome!

Just as Saturn, Jupiter and Venus moved out of orb, the faster moving but more powerful Sun moved into square aspect with Saturn, a transit that although exact yesterday will affect us for most of the coming week. If my own experience is anything to go by, this transit may seriously bend your self-confidence out of shape! Be sure to keep a close watch on your self-talk; a few positive affirmations would not go astray over the next few days!

Today the Moon in Scorpio is conjunct Saturn and square the Sun so don’t expect this weekend to be overly jolly and carefree. In fact you may find yourself ‘doing the work’ so to speak, dredging up long buried emotions. With Saturn heading back into Sagittarius on 18 September this will be the last conjunction of the Moon and Saturn in Scorpio for 28 years. Make the most of it and don’t shy away from getting down and dirty – it will be worth the effort.

Venus conjunct Mars – reward after the heavy Saturn work!

From 29 August Venus conjunct Mars at 15 degrees Leo will bring much needed relief as these strong masculine and feminine energies combine in Leo to create a passionate, sexy and creative energy. Connection between lovers is especially favoured and if your natal chart aligns well you can expect fireworks in the bedroom!

Although a fast moving transit Venus conjunct Mars will bring a very pleasant few days where you are likely to feel outgoing, social and attractive. Both physical and creative energy will be heightened so engaging in a group activity such as dancing, sport or performance will bring out the best in you. In fact physical activity of any kind will probably feel great!

With Venus conjunct Mars in Leo making a wide trine to Uranus in Aries this is a fiery, passionate energy that could have you jumping into a new relationship without thinking. If you choose the right person this will probably result in a pleasant though ephemeral connection, but if you’re not careful you could end up in a messy liaison with someone you don’t really trust or respect, especially as Venus is still in retrograde motion.

Venus conjunct Mars will last until 6 September when Venus stations direct, moving back into her active, outgoing mode. The effect of this transit will then begin to taper off, however the trine between Venus and Uranus will strengthen and will impact us through most of September. This is a great time for meeting new people and making connections that could change your way of looking at the world and open up new possibilities. 

How will Venus conjunct Mars affect you?

Depending on the unique configuration of your natal chart, Venus conjunct Mars could have a strong impact or very little at all. Those with planets between 12 and 18 degrees of the fire (Aries, Leo or Sagittarius) or fixed (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio or Aquarius) signs will feel Venus conjunct Mars particularly strongly. Look also to see through which house transiting Mars conjunct Venus is passing, as this will tell you which area of life will be most affected. 

For example in my natal chart 15 degrees Leo is in the 3rd House of communication making this a transit that will probably have an inspired affect on my writing and help me to articulate my ideas with fervour. However with Venus conjunct Mars squaring my natal Uranus at 15 degrees Scorpio this is probably not the best time to take on difficult conversations that are not absolutely necessary.

http://www.insightastrology.net/current-transits/venus-conjunct-mars/

Things are, looking up;)

Do You Feel It?

Do you feel it?

There is a clearing happening now.  A clearing of things that no longer serve your highest good. You have been feeling that for some time.  This you know.  It isn't necessarily a time of new beginnings, although we begin anew with each breath.  Discernment is key.  Trust your intuition.

It is a hot and humid day in the Nantahala National Forest.  Two pair of hummingbirds fly back and forth.  The cardinals cling to their respective branches as an elusive breeze passes by.  I want more coolness, more breeze.  

I want some things to be different than they are.  I also know my wanting isn't always the best outcome.  Mostly, I am content with how things are.  At least I was until the brillant cardinal moved out of my close camera range.  It is time to invest in a lens that will provide me with the intimate detail for which I yearn. 

My frustration continues with this Mac.  It insists upon locking on blue squares and rectangles upon words which I just typed.  It has a mind of its own and I don't much care for it.  The hummingbirds do another fly by.  They are curious about my nutty fruity salad which I eat between putting words on paper.  The Mac must have heard me because it stopped that irritating function.  At least for a time.  

Sometimes I feel as though I am on a mountainside in Africa.  The film, Out Of Africa is always in my mind.  I am grateful the temperatures here in the forest do not compete with those in Africa.  Perched in the high Adirondack chair, I think of the people in my life for whom I am more than grateful. That I can share, request silly things.  That they laugh with me because they are doing the same.  I love the humanity we share.  That we can talk of our own cleansings and letting go.  That all the parts of ourselves are loved and cared about.  

Do you feel it?

Small Foot

It is dark outside.  The continual thumps in the rafters, as well as in the foundation and even the support posts from the sunroom cry out.

For a while I have suspected an animal in the side yard near the retaining wall.  The area is newly seeded and strawed.  It gets raked after a downpour to ensure the seed is just a quarter of an inch under the soil.  Especially along the new steps.  Today, I saw child-like footprints, the size of a five or six year old.  I also saw smaller footprints but without claws or toes.

Without realizing what I saw were footprints, I began to rake the area of three or four such prints.  There has been another downpour last night and some areas have washed away. Noticing some kind of pattern below, I stopped cold in my own tracks.  These footprints were all similar.  

The interesting thing about this is that there were no hind paw prints. Apparently, it was a bi-pedal mammal.  As you can see, the photo below is depicts moist, freshly laid top soil with grass seed sprinkled atop it.  On top of that is straw. The hole is mid center toward the bottom.  Again, I evened the topsoil, so there is not much trace of the footprint.

To give you a sense of why I believe this footprint was here, take a look at where this area abutted.

                                                                before topsoil/seed

This area just under the steps has not been stained yet.  It  is open and allows for water to enter through the landing and lattice skirting.  A medium grade mil plastic covers the ground inside the little enclosure so that weeds and grass can not grow.  I suspect whatever was present last night was looking for a water source.

Throughout the yard, especially on the cliff side (near the peach Adirondack chairs) I saw a few small sized holes.  They could have been from the abundance of rabbits of all sizes, or perhaps even raccoons or skunks.  I will set the trail camera tonight to see if anything returns.