On Sexual Harassment

Just the other day a friend asked me a question.  I still have my mouth open about it.  Mostly, in shock.

"Do you think people who sexually harassed others in the 60s and on are liable?"

"Liable, he says."

My jaw nearly dropped.

"Liable, are you kidding?  Touching someone inappropriately at work or on a date is totally wrong. Playing power games on a worker for sex is wrong."

We could call it bullying.  Or sexual molestation if they are touch.  I will settle for sexual harassment.  The perpetrator should be fired.  On the spot.

NBC knew long before Matt Lauer's final professional demise what was going on.  So did Rupert Murdoch at Fox (cough) News.

"Liable ?"he asks.

Without a doubt.  Crimes like this have no expiration date.  Nor do the memories of the victims.  I have been there.

I am told Trump was 'elected' president.  How can we be sure?  Mueller and team are hard at work investigating what really went on.  It doesn't look good.

But there is far more to the story.  Why would anyone vote for a sexual predator?  Can all these women being lying?  A recent article explains some of it:

https://rantt.com/why-women-vote-for-sexual-predators-1a33194492a9

We know that former second class citizens can't have much of a sense of self-worth. Look at what we did to the native Americans and it has been decades just trying to help them recover emotionally and financially.  We are so used to sweeping these behaviors under the rug.  Both men and women laugh at these things.  I sure don't.

It is time for all these women to be compensated for what they have endured.  Lost wages, lost promotions, depression and PTSD. It is also time to raise all of our consciousnesses over the horrible treatment of people - men and women.

Do I think people who sexually harassed others in the 60s and on are liable?  You bet!

Happy December

Sometimes the universe sends you messages.  Sometimes they seem, at first, to be confusing ones.  I think I was tested, maybe even teased to see if I really wanted to stay in the Smokies.  That the buyer for my mountain home backed out with a few signs of hesitation before said it all.

So did my colon, which wasn't too happy about me signing a contract.  I was more physically upset than I knew.  And that, comes from someone who thought she was pretty in touch with her body mind.

"There are other solutions," my inner voice reminded me.

"Pick one."

I have been mulling it over, even looking for a place to rent.  I did find one rental I really like, but the real estate agent wasn't ethical.  Then I found a house but it became a bidding war.  Now the house is back on the market.  I won't buy it.  It doesn't feel right now.

So maybe buying a condo is the thing to do. My wonderful new real estate agent is trying to secure one in a lovely little community.  Of course, I will still keep the mountain house.  My soul is here. And it is by the ocean in New England.  It can be in two places.

Sometimes the universe sends you messages.  Sometimes you have to let them be.  Let things happen naturally.

Maybe that is why I love being in nature.  Whether the mountains or the ocean.  Yes, both will do nicely.

Happy Holidays!

Letting Go...Again

I am just down.  Dissatisfied.  Isolated.  Feeling like I am done here.  Everything points to do it.  Then there is the offer on my beloved home.  I know it is time to go.  But to where?  What can I afford and still live comfortably on the meager amount I get for my home.  Having a lovely home, relatively new, or better yet NEW is important to me.

A friend from out of state called today.  In fact, I have been hearing from lots of friends lately.  It is fall, so I am cleaning out my list of who will follow me into 2018.  There will be lots of changes.

The nasties are definitely being left.  I miss having someone to talk to.  Someone to run things by.  A partner.  Seems everyone is too busy for friendship.  Or maybe that is because I have made some lousy choices in them.  I am grateful to have a couple of close ones.

A dear friend has a new boyfriend.  He seems perfect for her and I couldn't be happier.  She deserves the very best.  Other friends just lost their partners.  They are forlorned, vulnerable and mourning.

I think this time of year is for reflection. Looking back but definitely looking more forward.  Looking at the choices we have made in mates - friends.  Partners.  Are we doing the same thing expecting a different result?

Three years ago after a short lived, ridiculous semi-relationship, I vowed to take a few years off and just reflect.  Think about the next adventure.  Notice the signs that it is time to go.  Maybe the hardest thing now for me is to just be.  Let the process unfold.  No expectations.  No attachment.

Fb People

Enough already!

Let's start posting nice things.  Happy moments. Surely they compromise more of your life than abused animals and children and those dumb enough to stay in those kinds of relationships.  Enough of $rump stories (yeah, I have posted a few, too).  Enough of people, animals and homes under water.  Enough of fake news, how you loathe your white privilege, bandwagoneers.  You jump on a cause, bleed it until there is nothing left and do absolutely nothing about it after you moan and groan.

Is this all you know?

I had a wonderful weekend.  There was a daycare center picnic, a boat tour around Casco Bay,  trips to downtown Portland, a Marimba band concert, dinners and lunches out and at home.  There was lots of family interaction, and a toddler who knocked at my door in the morning calling my name.  And a toddler who asked where I was when I left to fly home.

Life is for the living.  There is more positive than negative in the world.  Hold the moments, tell a funny story. Inspire others.  Leave the world and others better than you found them

On Self Leadership

Do you really have to look to another person to lead you?  MLK, Obama, some mouth on the news, the internet and media will tell you who to follow. Where are you on any of this?   Where is your heart?

C'mon we all know what is right.  I don't buy for one second that you blame your lot in life on anyone else.  Really?

Beware of the Fb nemes, posts that tell part of the story and get your adrenaline pumping.  We seem to be in a culture that does a lot of that.

There is a writer for a local newspaper, the SMN.  One writer never tells the whole story.  Who, what, where, how and why.  Basic tenets of journalism.

Most recently, she headlined a story about a local tribe who was not going to fund senior citizen utility bills.  The headliner was heart wrenching.  I even wrote her to suggest that she do a full interview and get to the real story. (they are other funding stories to take care of them).  Have called her in the past telling her to do the WHOLE story, too.  I suppose the editor doesn't care much.  Nor does the readership.  Apparently.  Anyway, they lost my following.

Stand up.  Speak out.  Love from your heart.  You don't have to like the behaviors of others.  You do have to be kind about it.

Be your own self leader.  Now. Our survival demands it.

Rethinking America

The latest outrage in the United States is now about Confederate statutes.  A recent incident in Charlottesville, Virginia touched off the sensitivities of a few.   Many have jumped on this bandwagon.  Remove the statues they say.   A group of thugs decided to do the deed themselves.  They await the legal system. A nation cries out.  Why now?

Let us be clear.  We are not a fair country.  51% of our statues do not represent women in all the areas women were and are involved.  Streets and highways are named after paid male politicians, judges and others and don’t reflect the free contributions of all citizens.  Statues often reflect the victors of war, not those who sought and continue to peace and unity.  

It seems these bandwagon movements are short lived and not sustainable.  We see this in civil rights; how we treat one another on a daily basis ; children, animals, veterans, and those at the sunset of life.  Those that rule our country come from wealth and tend to enact laws that maintain their lifestyle, not the population they are elected to represent.  

We are a country that gives corporations personhood, allows puppy mills, child and elder abuse, human trafficking, and the 51% to be treated as second class citizens.  We continue to do that with anyone who isn’t white, wealthy, male.  

It is said we are one of the most charitable nations.  On paper, money transfer, checks.  We don’t get involved with the hungry family down the street, or the older woman living alone whose front door won’t open.  Our time is spent sedentary, often on the internet, not engaged with our community. If we do, it has to be over beer and wine.  We couldn't do it sober.

A recent survey of Facebook bandwagon comments doesn’t bring disparate groups together, or even groups with similar opinions among the so-called liberal community.  They are about puffing themselves up, putting you down.  They aren’t about listening, engaging or moving the human spirit forward.  

Where will the bandwagon mentality be next month?  Who will they put down?  These people don’t care about you.  They care about themselves.  That, is the real outrage.

Wimps

Time to wake up!  Time is running out.

Politicians do not care about the constituents.  They only want your vote.  They care about being re-elected.  They care about the money they will make in office and the power they will have.  It has been that way FOREVER.

Yes, they are some caring ones. Barbara Mikulski from Maryland.  And yes, I know her.  I worked with her sister, Fran.  Fabulous family. Deep values.  Honesty. Integrity.

Jimmy Carter also cared for people. Hubert Humphrey from Minnesota (the Happy Warrior) cared.  I am at  a loss to remember who else cared/cares.

And yes, they have you where they want you.  They scatter crumbs here and there.  Tell you they have not allowing folks from seven Arab countries to come into the U.S.A. Never mind that Obama did something similar.  You are worried about them?  Where were you when they were bombing their homelands.  Put into boats.  Are you going to sponsor them?  Let them live with you?

I hardly doubt it.

Enough said.